Bathroom Bills, Caregiving, and Human Dignity

By Marissa Shaw
The first bathroom bill controversy started in 2016 with legislation in North Carolina that unjustly restricted transgender individuals from using bathrooms that aligned with their gender identity.  As of 2025, there are 19 states with proposed or passed legislation across the United States that unfairly target transgender people and their access to public restrooms. Many of these so-called 'bathroom bills' attempt to restrict individuals from using restrooms that align with their gender identity, instead requiring them to use the restroom that corresponds with the sex listed on their birth certificate.
Let's pause and think about what that means. These bills are not about safety. They're about control. They assume that someone's gender identity is up for debate, that a stranger can question it, and that the very act of using the bathroom should be policed. Are we truly at a place in our society where we need "bathroom police"?

And what happens when we expand this conversation beyond gender?

What if, like me, you're a person with a disability who needs help in the bathroom, and your caregiver is a different gender?

Across the country, there are cases where caregivers are being denied entry into public restrooms to assist someone of the opposite gender, even when that person physically cannot use the restroom without help. I live this reality. I'm a woman who uses a wheelchair and needs assistance from caregivers, some of whom are men. Should I be denied the right to relieve myself safely and with dignity because of someone else's discomfort?
These laws don't just affect the transgender community. They affect anyone whose needs fall outside the rigid gender norms that these bills are trying to enforce.

In truth, bathroom access is not a "culture war" issue. It's a human rights issue. It's about safety, dignity, and access. And yet, society continues to overlook practical solutions.
Enter: Gender-Neutral Family Bathrooms

Family restrooms, also known as all-gender or gender-neutral bathrooms, offer a practical and feasible solution to this issue. They provide privacy, safety, and accessibility for everyone. They're ideal for parents with children of different genders, people with disabilities and their caregivers, and yes, transgender and non-binary individuals who want to use the bathroom in peace.
This isn't a radical idea. It's a commonsense solution.
So why don't we have more of them?

Because too often, fear and misinformation drive our policies, not lived experience or empathy. Those who oppose inclusive bathroom access rarely consider people like me—people with disabilities whose very ability to be in public spaces hinges on access to a restroom with the support we need.

People who support these restrictive laws might say they're protecting privacy. But whose privacy are we protecting if the result is someone wetting themselves because their caregiver isn't allowed to help them? Whose safety are we defending when transgender youth are forced into unsafe situations because they can't use the bathroom that matches their identity?

We need to think bigger. We need to act more humanely.

A policy rooted in fear doesn't protect anyone. But policies grounded in dignity, accessibility, and inclusion protect everyone.

​As a society, we must move past the notion that public bathrooms are battlegrounds for culture wars. They are essential spaces places where people fulfill a basic human need. The right to access a bathroom should never be determined by someone else's fear or assumptions about gender.

We need more gender-neutral bathrooms in schools, parks, airports, and government buildings. We need policies that allow caregivers of any gender to assist the people who depend on them. We need to stop treating basic human needs as if they're up for political debate.

Because at the end of the day, it's not about which bathroom someone uses. It's about treating each other with respect and kindness, regardless of our differences.